You’ve already done a lot with this course so far. You figured out what kind of friendships you want. You made a list of all your interests (and potential interests). And now you have a good understanding of the different places to meet potential friends.
Now we’re going to use all that to find specific places for you to meet people.
This goal of this lesson is to:
- Find specific events, groups, or places that will help you make new friends.
- Secure your spot for the event (if needed).
- Put it on your calendar.
Once you have a steady pipeline of events or activities to attend, you’ll be ready for the next module where you’ll learn how to meet these people the right way.
Let’s get started.
What Should You Look For?
I highly recommend you find one CSG you can attend at least once per week. If you do, that’s enough to move on to the next module.
If you want to attend more than one CSG per week, great. Just be careful that you don’t go overboard. Each group deserves your full commitment and you don’t want to burn yourself out. Your goal is to enjoy life, not create more stress.
And of course, you can (and should) do other activities as well. If you can meet up with a friend who includes other friends you haven’t met, or if you can go to a conference, great. Do that also. But it’s good to have one CSG per week going on in your life at all times, especially when you’re looking to make new friends.
Brainstorming Ideas
The first step to finding good groups and activities is to brainstorm:
- Look at your goals
- Look at your interests
- Think about the type of people you want to meet
- Think of groups that might meet regularly and include any or all of your above
If you want a big group of adventurous friends, you like marketing, and you want to meet really smart people who push the boundaries of what’s possible, you can try looking for business masterminds, meetups based on marketing or entrepreneurship, or classes focused on marketing or other business topics.
But mainly, look back at your interests (and the five questions you answered), and look for groups based on those. Then, just do a quick check to see if it aligns with your goals and if it’s possible to meet the type of people you want.
You’re just brainstorming right now, so it doesn’t have to be perfect. Just jot down ideas that could possibly work.
Research
Once you have some ideas, you need to do some research. Here are the best ways to find good CSGs, meetups, and other activities:
Specific Online Searches
Go to the computer and do research. You’ll need to do a lot of trial and error, but here are some tips for what to include in your search:
- Your area – city, county, region, etc.
- Your interest
- One of the following group-type terms – group, club, meetup, class, organization, team, league, sessions. Be creative and use any others you think can help.
It should look something like this: “[your interest] [your group-type term] in [your area].”
So for example, you could try “Climbing group in Denver.” Then try “Climbing sessions in Denver.” Keep trying with different variations.
Get more specific. Get vaguer. Try different terms. The more different combinations you try, the better your chances of finding good groups or activities.
Generic Online Searches
To gather more ideas and find groups that you wouldn’t think of, you can search for less specific ideas like, “Things to do in [your city].” Or “Fun activities.”
This is a good way of gathering ideas when you’re drawing blanks and can kickstart your creativity or land you on a good option.
Meetup.com
Meetup.com can also be a great resource for finding CSGs. You can search for specific types of groups near you, or you can peruse the website to see what kinds of groups are available in your area.
Go Outside
Finally, if the internet isn’t helping much or you just want to expand your list of potential CSGs, you can go out of the house and looking for them. You can go to a retail store that is built around a specific hobby and ask employees if they know of any groups or classes based around it. For example, go to places like REI for outdoor activity groups and classes, running shoe stores for running groups, and cookware stores for cooking classes.
Take Notes, Prioritize, and Make Sure You Can Do it
When you find anything remotely interesting, jot it down in a spreadsheet or somewhere you can refer back to. Personally, when I’m going to have an opening in my schedule (like my soccer league is ending), I’ll go back to my spreadsheet and see if I want to look into any of the previous CSGs I noted.
Once you have a good list, go through it and find the ones that look most interesting to you. Rank your top three or five.
When you find one that interests you, dive deeper and figure out the details:
- Does it cost money? How much?
- Will you be able to commit to it?
- Are you available during those time slots?
- Do you think you’ll enjoy it?
- Do you have to do anything to prepare (finish reading a book, buy gear, fill out paperwork, etc.)? Will you be able to do it?
Here’s an example of what your notes might look like (you can view the PDF here):
If it still looks like a go, you’re all set! Sign up and get it on your calendar.
Action Steps
1. Create Worksheet #3: Your CSGs
After brainstorming and researching potential CSGs, find a handful of actual CSGs that you’d consider joining. Enter them into Worksheet #3 so you can compare and determine which one(s) to choose.
2. Sign up for your first CSG and add it to your calendar
Congrats! You’re on your way to making new friends!
3. Review your calendar weekly to determine whether you need to find and join any new CSGs
Do you have enough social outings planned for the upcoming week? (i.e. do you have at least one CSG commitment planned?)
- If yes, you’re done here! Your week is all set.
- If not, review your Worksheet #3 or research new CSGs and find one to join.
If you can’t find a CSG to join for the upcoming week, that’s okay. Many CSGs only have a few openings per year (e.g. adult league sports teams only open prior to each season). But sign up for one as soon as you can.
CSGs are not the only activities you can schedule. You can go to events, conferences, coffee shops, or wherever you want, and that’s great. In the next module, you’ll learn how to meet people in all these different places.
You want to have at least one CSG planned and the rest of your schedule is up to you. I recommend filling it with activities you love to do, regardless of how social they are.
That’s it!